Diabetes-Life Struggle

I have been a diabetic for twenty years. When I was first diagnosed, I was sent to a nutritionist. The person was a complete waste of $75. He did not listen to the fact I have food allergies. He insisted I MUST eat 2000 calories a day (I had never eaten 2000 calories a day in my life). He also insisted I MUST eat foods I was allergic to.

My doctor put me on the maximum dose of Metformin...a drug which will ruin your kidneys. Hello, I already have diabetes, do we need to incapacitate me, too???? Why not the lowest dose?

I attempted to eat healthy, but found myself steadily gaining weight. No one told me the diabetes meds would cause weight gain. Ugh. So, I am supposed to lose weight and you put me on meds causing me to gain weight. Makes sense...to no one with a working brain.

Over the years we played with different kinds of diabetes meds. Some I couldn't take due to reactions. Others didn't seem to work. I was frustrated, so I ate. I would try dieting them found myself binge eating. It was a vicious cycle.

Finally, in 2002 I started Weight Watchers. I lost fifteen pounds. I felt better. 2003 brought a job transfer, stress, and elevated blood sugars. Doubled the weight I had lost. Saw an endocrinologist who was sure I had Hashi Moto Syndrome, too. She put me on Byeta. What a nightmare. Since I didn't have Hashi Moto's. She passed me off to her PA. First, I detest PAs and won't see them if I can avoid it. Second, the Byeta gave me nausea after every meal. I couldn't take it. We parted ways.

Then a dear friend and mentor died of diabetic complications. She was fifty-eight, the age I planned to retire. It was my wake up call. I had to take control.

I started by making a fist. Your fist is the size your stomach is supposed to be. I used salad plates for my meals, pushed all the food to the center of the plate, made a fist, took my knife and went around my fist. Everything on the outside went into a container for the next meal. I did this in restaurants, too. Then took a doggy bag home.

The first year, I lost twenty-five pounds just using portion control. I can't begin to tell you how much better I felt.

Year two, I started watching what I ate. No more junk food. No fried foods. I was still doing portion control. More vegetables were added to my diet. The result at the end of the year was another twenty-five pounds lost.

So, with the help of a friend, year three, I added thirty minutes of walking five days a week. It was amazing. I was still doing everything from years one and two. I bought a pedometer which played classical music when I walked. It was not loud, just enough so you knew it was there. By the end of the year I was down another twenty-five pounds.

So for all you math folks, I was losing 2.08 pounds a month. I'd lost a total of seventy-five pounds. It was staying off.

Then, something unexpected happened. I retired. A full two years before I planned to retire. Determined not to sit around and gain weight, I spent three months of winter in south Texas. Where I walked, swam, and continued the previous years good habits. I bought the book The 30 Day Diabetes Cure and started following it.

You guessed it. I was down another twenty-five pounds. My sugar levels were dropping. I no longer needed my rescue inhalant for my asthma.

Still, I needed to lose thirty-five pounds. I learned I binge eat when I am stressed. Yet, I was healthier than I had been in years. People noticed. A friend didn't recognize me one day when I stopped into the school for a visit.

I got rid of my "fat" clothes. They were just taking up space in my closet and dresser. My house got a make over and I sold it in March, 2015.

I moved to Johns Island, SC in April, 2015. Living in an apartment was a trip. I forgot how thin the walls could be. After six months, I bought a house. It was cute and full of charm, but was not meant to be my forever home.

My blood sugars were out of control. There was no place safe to walk. I played with a five to ten pound gain/loss. I knew I could not take Lantus insulin. Levemir worked for two years before causing nausea after every shot.

I was trying desperately to control my sugars and nothing was working. My stress level was out-of-sight. One night my sugar was so high before dinner, I called a friend and asked her to take me to the ER. After four and a half hours I was put on Novaflex.

It worked wonderfully for about three weeks, then I broke out in a rash. Guess who is allergic to insulin?? Yep, me.

I'm struggling. I moved back to Michigan at the end of 2017. Saw an endocrinologist and refused to return. He prescribed Lantus, which I knew I was allergic to. My regular doctor wanted me to take Lipitor for cholesterol. Lipitor causes diabetes in some women. Imagine what it does to someone who is already a diabetic. Picture me in search of a new doctor.

Then a friend found an all natural med which took her A1c from 8.9 to 6.9 in six weeks. I ordered the seven day trial and thought I was onto something. So, I ordered it. Surprise, surprise. Guess seven days wasn't enough to discover I am allergic to it.

I called the company today. They took all my information and symptoms. Someone is supposed to call me. back.

My current plan is to go lean meat, low carb. Add walking back in. We'll see if it makes a difference. I am pretty much ready to give up.

TTFN

What Inspired You to Write?

It was the question of the day. The answer is always complicated. I don't think it was any one thing.
For years I was called a daydreamer. I could be in class and not hear a word said. I'd be looking out a window and not see the playground or the front of the building, but far away places. Lands of knights, damsels in distress, fairies, elves, witches and more.

It wasn't until I was ten, I wrote something for my reading class and the teacher told me with my imagination, he'd see me in books some day. I believed him. My parents did nothing to discourage my belief.

We moved to a new town the year I started seventh grade. It was a traumatic move for me. I started writing poetry to express what I was feeling. I got good at writing poetry. I tried short stories, but just couldn't seem to make characters who were real. I didn't know how and no one who could have helped me seemed interested.

I took all the writing classes I could in college. Even my narrative writing professor told me I had talent, but she didn't know how to help me develop it. I started reading books on writing.

Being an avid reader I read two to three novels a week. Mostly mystery. I liked trying to figure out who did it before it was revealed by the author. I got pretty good at it. Every once in a while I slip up.
I just finished The Burial Hour by Jeffrey Deavers. I was clueless until the end.

I stumbled onto National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) in 2003. I was eight days late starting. I had a day with no power, yet I finished my first novel in 21 days. No, it was not ready for publication. It was 2004 before the novel made it to print. I was surprised to know it sold 160 copies. Not bad for a first book. Not great, but not bad. The book is now in its second edition.

Since then I have written nine other books, two workbooks for writing classes I teach and three $0.99 ebooks. It was just the beginning.

I continue to write, not because my teacher told me I could, but because I have stories to tell. If I don't write them, I will go crazy.

So, what inspired me to write? Maybe it was Mrs. Snell telling the story of the Jungle Book and having us look outside her window to the forest there. Maybe it was Mr. Ireland telling me, I had an imagination. Maybe it was always what I was supposed to do.

TTFN

It's Been a Month

Dad,

  It's been a month since you left us. Mom is doing well. We are taking her to dinner at Gracie's on Friday for her birthday. 

  Megan is still in Florida on vacation. Jason is having his first sitting for his senior pictures. Diane and Kim are preparing to start another year at school. 

  Mike had a window ledge give out on him at work and fell into a 4 foot window well. He was home for two days with that injury. Did some soft tissue damage and comes home limping every night. 

  Finally sold my house. We closed on July 31st as planned. Money is in the bank with the exception of the CMU student loan for Megan I paid off. Still have three for MSU. But we're working on them. 

  Secrets was re-released today. I'm hoping it sells well. The cover looks awesome and it is in normal type now. Only the poetry book to redo. I have a mystery box series coming out for 12 months. If it goes over well, I will look at a second one. Hoping to finish Macy book 4 this month.  My class again only has one student, but I'll take one every time. 

  I'm looking at three new authors for Lilac Publishing. Not something I planned, just something which fell into my lap. Nothing from any of them until next year. 

  Cut off my hair. It was just too hot to keep it long. Mike says I look like Peter Pan. I like it and it's easy to maintain.

  Dean has been up again to spend time with Mom. Had to go home early to take care of an air conditioner problem causing a leak in the bathroom. 

   Savannah is getting ready for her first year of college. She's going to be a smashing success. And she already has friends who are there. 

   I have found something natural to take for my blood sugar. The goal is to be off the Metformin by the end of the year. Cannot use all the products the company makes, but can use the important ones. A bit pricy, but living is pricy.

   Paying the final light bill in South Carolina today. Going to get my Michigan driver's license. Then hopefully I can get insurance for the car so I can go get plates tomorrow. Working with MEEMIC again. 

   Went to a wedding last weekend in Rose City. It was the marriage of one of my first students 28 years ago when I started teaching up there. Very nice service. I was pleased to be invited. Saw some old friends and former students. Going up later this month for another wedding. Mike and I are going to stay at Diane's that weekend. Looking forward to it.

   Well, if I am going to accomplish anything today, I need to get busy. 

Miss you every day. 

Love,

Becky